Did you know that just wearing different colored shirts is enough for kids to start thinking the other color is worse?
Thanks for sharing. You're not the only one.
- Splitting up is very easy. Scientists split some young people into two groups for no real reason. Even though they didn't know each other, they started to prefer their own group. (Tajfel et al., 1971) It happens with shirts, classes and teams!
- We learn what we hear. If at home or at school we hear that «those people» are bad, we repeat it without thinking.
- Sometimes we think they don't like us. And they think the same about us. Lots of times, both are wrong!
- Getting to know them helps. When you play with someone from the other group, you find out they're more like you than you thought.
True or not true?
Choose, and the card shows you what the evidence says.
«The kids on the other team are all bad.»
Answer
Not true. Every team has good kids.
«If someone talks differently, they're weird.»
Answer
Not true. Different is just different.
«I can be on my team and be friends with someone from the other.»
Answer
True. Of course you can!
«Getting to know someone helps me see what they're really like.»
Answer
True. That's how you discover the person.
On a field trip, Lía's class shares the bus with a class from another school. Lía ends up sitting next to a girl she doesn't know. Her name is Ana.
At first they don't talk. Then Ana shows her a drawing. Lía teaches her a clapping game. They laugh the whole trip.
As they get off, Ana says:
—My friends said you guys were annoying.
Lía laughs.
—My friends said the same about you!
How are we alike?
Think of a kid from another class, another team or another country. With the adult, make a list of ways you're alike: do you like to play? Do you have a family? Do you like ice cream?
Just for the adult: in more than a hundred studies, prejudice in children appeared early and peaked around ages 5 to 7. Then it eases a little, especially when they get to know children from other groups. (Raabe and Beelmann, 2011) What you say about «them» at home matters a lot. If a «those people» slips out, say so out loud: «That wasn't right, they're not all like that».
Think of a kid from another group and three ways you're alike.
How are you like someone you thought was very different?
The story of the reds and the blues.
Finish and go to lesson 4 →Sources for this lesson
- Tajfel, H., Billig, M. G., Bundy, R. P. and Flament, C. (1971). Social categorization and intergroup behaviour. European Journal of Social Psychology, 1(2), 149–178. View source: Tajfel, H., Billig, M. G., Bundy, R. P. and Flament, C. (1971). Social categorization and intergroup behaviour. European Journal of Social Psychology, 1(2), 149–178.
- Raabe, T. and Beelmann, A. (2011). Development of ethnic, racial, and national prejudice in childhood and adolescence: A multinational meta-analysis of age differences. Child Development, 82(6), 1715–1737. View source: Raabe, T. and Beelmann, A. (2011). Development of ethnic, racial, and national prejudice in childhood and adolescence: A multinational meta-analysis of age differences. Child Development, 82(6), 1715–1737.
In an experiment, some teenagers were split into two groups based on which painter they liked. They didn't know each other. Even so, they gave more rewards to their own group.
Thanks for sharing. You're not the only one.
1. Dividing is enough. As soon as there's an «us», a «them» appears. (Tajfel et al., 1971)
2. We think they hate us more than they do. Two opposing groups disliked each other about equally, but each one believed the other hated them much more. That exaggerated belief fed the hatred. (Moore-Berg et al., 2020)
3. Hatred gets clicks. Each word about the other group increased the odds of a post being shared by 67%. (Rathje, Van Bavel and van der Linden, 2021) What you see most online isn't what most people think.
4. We get used to it. Hearing insults about a group over and over makes them stop sounding wrong, and with that, prejudice grows. (Soral, Bilewicz and Winiewski, 2018)
5. Words that take away humanity prepare the ground. Seeing another group as «less human» goes hand in hand with supporting harm to them. (Kteily et al., 2015)
True or false?
Choose, and the card shows you what the evidence says.
«I don't have any «them».»
Answer
False. We all do.
«If so many people say it online, it's what most people think.»
Answer
False. What divides gets shared more.
«A meme never hurt anyone.»
Answer
It depends. A hundred memes about the same group make contempt seem normal.
«If I don't think like someone, I have to hate them.»
Answer
False. You can disagree and still see the person.
At the match against the school from the next neighborhood, Teo ends up on the bench next to a boy from the other team. His name is Joaquín.
They talk about video games. At the end, Joaquín says:
—We thought you guys hated us. In our chat they say you think you're better than us.
Teo laughs. In his chat they said the same about them.
Where does your «them» come from?
1 · Choose your strongest «them». Where does it come from?
2 · What do you think they think of you? Do you know, or are you assuming?
When you see something online against a group, ask yourself: «Is this what most people think, or what gets shared most?».
What did you think «they» thought of you?
A fan club chat, a stadium and a cousin.
Finish and go to lesson 4 →Sources for this lesson
- Tajfel, H., Billig, M. G., Bundy, R. P. and Flament, C. (1971). Social categorization and intergroup behaviour. European Journal of Social Psychology, 1(2), 149–178. View source: Tajfel, H., Billig, M. G., Bundy, R. P. and Flament, C. (1971). Social categorization and intergroup behaviour. European Journal of Social Psychology, 1(2), 149–178.
- Moore-Berg, S. L., Ankori-Karlinsky, L.-O., Hameiri, B. and Bruneau, E. (2020). Exaggerated meta-perceptions predict intergroup hostility between American political partisans. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, 117(26), 14864–14872. View source: Moore-Berg, S. L., Ankori-Karlinsky, L.-O., Hameiri, B. and Bruneau, E. (2020). Exaggerated meta-perceptions predict intergroup hostility between American political partisans. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, 117(26), 14864–14872.
- Rathje, S., Van Bavel, J. J. and van der Linden, S. (2021). Out-group animosity drives engagement on social media. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, 118(26), e2024292118. View source: Rathje, S., Van Bavel, J. J. and van der Linden, S. (2021). Out-group animosity drives engagement on social media. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, 118(26), e2024292118.
- Soral, W., Bilewicz, M. and Winiewski, M. (2018). Exposure to hate speech increases prejudice through desensitization. Aggressive Behavior, 44(2), 136–146. View source: Soral, W., Bilewicz, M. and Winiewski, M. (2018). Exposure to hate speech increases prejudice through desensitization. Aggressive Behavior, 44(2), 136–146.
- Kteily, N., Bruneau, E., Waytz, A. and Cotterill, S. (2015). The ascent of man: Theoretical and empirical evidence for blatant dehumanization. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 109(5), 901–931. View source: Kteily, N., Bruneau, E., Waytz, A. and Cotterill, S. (2015). The ascent of man: Theoretical and empirical evidence for blatant dehumanization. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 109(5), 901–931.
In an experiment, a group of teenagers was split into two teams based on which painter they preferred.
They didn't know each other. Nothing was at stake. Even so, when it came to handing out rewards, they gave more to their own team.
Dividing was enough.
Thanks for sharing. You're not the only one.
Dividing is enough
That experiment has been repeated many times, with colors, with shirts and with random draws. (Tajfel, Billig, Bundy and Flament, 1971) As soon as there's an «us», a «them» appears, and we start favoring our own.
This doesn't make you a bad person. It makes you human. But knowing it helps you not confuse what your mind feels with the truth about the other person.
We think they hate us more than they do
In a large study of people from two opposing political parties, both sides disliked each other about equally. But each side believed the other hated them much more than it really did. And that exaggerated belief was what best predicted wanting to keep away from the other side and seeing it as an enemy. (Moore-Berg, Ankori-Karlinsky, Hameiri and Bruneau, 2020)
It's a loop: I think you hate me, so I hate you a little more, and you do the same.
Hatred gets clicks
Across almost 3 million social media posts, each word about the other group increased the odds of the post being shared by 67%. (Rathje, Van Bavel and van der Linden, 2021)
That's why what you see most online isn't what most people think. It's what gets shared most. And what gets shared most is often what divides most.
We get used to it
In several studies, people who heard more insults against a group became less sensitive to them: the insults stopped sounding wrong. And with that, their prejudice against the group grew. (Soral, Bilewicz and Winiewski, 2018)
The first insult makes you uncomfortable. By the hundredth, it seems normal.
Words that take away humanity prepare the ground
In seven studies across three countries, seeing another group as «less human» went hand in hand with supporting punishment and aggression against that group. (Kteily, Bruneau, Waytz and Cotterill, 2015)
That's why words matter. «Plague», «rats», «invasion» aren't just exaggerations. They're the first step toward making harm to someone seem acceptable.
True or false?
Choose, and the card shows you what the evidence says.
«I don't have any «them».»
Answer
False. We all do. Dividing is enough for it to appear.
«If so many people say it online, it must be what most people think.»
Answer
False. What divides gets shared more. What you see isn't what most people think.
«A joke never hurt anyone.»
Answer
It depends. One, maybe not. A hundred jokes about the same group make contempt seem normal.
«If I disagree with someone, I have to hate them.»
Answer
False. You can disagree and still see the person.
Mara spends the night reading comments in the neighborhood chat. Everyone is talking about «outsiders». She's left with the feeling that «they» look down on the people of the neighborhood.
The next day, at the parents' meeting, she ends up sitting next to Rosa, Andrés's wife. They talk about homework, the teacher, the cold.
At the end, Rosa says quietly:
—I know a lot of people in the neighborhood don't want us here. Sometimes I'm scared to leave my daughter at the gate.
Mara freezes. She thought «they» looked down on the neighborhood. Rosa thought the whole neighborhood hated them.
They were both wrong. And neither would have known without sitting next to the other.
Where does your «them» come from?
Step 1 · Go back to your map from lesson 1 and choose your strongest «them».
Step 2 · Where does it come from? Mark everything that applies.
Step 3 · What do you think they think of you? Write it in one sentence. Then ask yourself: do you know, or are you assuming?
Step 4 · Finish the sentence.
When you see something online that talks badly about a group, ask yourself: «Is this what most people think, or what gets shared most?».
What did you think «they» thought of you? How could you find out if it's true?
A message in the neighborhood chat. A baker who stops being Andrés and becomes «the foreigner».
In the next lesson you'll see what hatred of others costs, in a neighborhood and in a family.
Finish and go to lesson 4 →Sources for this lesson
- Tajfel, H., Billig, M. G., Bundy, R. P. and Flament, C. (1971). Social categorization and intergroup behaviour. European Journal of Social Psychology, 1(2), 149–178. View source: Tajfel, H., Billig, M. G., Bundy, R. P. and Flament, C. (1971). Social categorization and intergroup behaviour. European Journal of Social Psychology, 1(2), 149–178.
- Moore-Berg, S. L., Ankori-Karlinsky, L.-O., Hameiri, B. and Bruneau, E. (2020). Exaggerated meta-perceptions predict intergroup hostility between American political partisans. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, 117(26), 14864–14872. View source: Moore-Berg, S. L., Ankori-Karlinsky, L.-O., Hameiri, B. and Bruneau, E. (2020). Exaggerated meta-perceptions predict intergroup hostility between American political partisans. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, 117(26), 14864–14872.
- Rathje, S., Van Bavel, J. J. and van der Linden, S. (2021). Out-group animosity drives engagement on social media. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, 118(26), e2024292118. View source: Rathje, S., Van Bavel, J. J. and van der Linden, S. (2021). Out-group animosity drives engagement on social media. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, 118(26), e2024292118.
- Soral, W., Bilewicz, M. and Winiewski, M. (2018). Exposure to hate speech increases prejudice through desensitization. Aggressive Behavior, 44(2), 136–146. View source: Soral, W., Bilewicz, M. and Winiewski, M. (2018). Exposure to hate speech increases prejudice through desensitization. Aggressive Behavior, 44(2), 136–146.
- Kteily, N., Bruneau, E., Waytz, A. and Cotterill, S. (2015). The ascent of man: Theoretical and empirical evidence for blatant dehumanization. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 109(5), 901–931. View source: Kteily, N., Bruneau, E., Waytz, A. and Cotterill, S. (2015). The ascent of man: Theoretical and empirical evidence for blatant dehumanization. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 109(5), 901–931.
Lesson 3 of 10.
Great start.
To take with youThink of a kid from another group and three ways you're alike.
To take with youWhen you see something online against a group, ask yourself: «Is this what most people think, or what gets shared most?».
To take with youWhen you see something online that talks badly about a group, ask yourself: «Is this what most people think, or what gets shared most?».
What you write and your progress are saved only on this device. When you finish the lesson we add 1 to the total, without knowing who you are.